I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
