that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
