Whoa Z and x make the same sound
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Houston, we have a squirter
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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