U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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