I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
