I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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