Pants 0. Shit 1.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
