in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize