Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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