So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
