dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
