And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Houston, we have a blender
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
