I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
USA USA USA
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.