i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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