I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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