Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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