he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
