Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
