no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
