when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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