The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Randomize
