he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
