Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
