We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize