He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
