I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
