We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
