so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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