Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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