He told me they were just razor bumps!
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize