Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize