YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
