Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize