He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You need Xanax blowdarts
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
