yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
