i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize