and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize