brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
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