You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
operation harelip BJ is a go
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
