I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
