girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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