so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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