epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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