...so i touched it.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
