Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  your parents love me but you hate me

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  (586): your parents love me but you hate me http://tfl.nu/ldwf
  Replies (8) Good night (1202) Bad night (2799)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.

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  (860): i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life. http://tfl.nu/14qy
  Replies (49) Good night (774) Bad night (6666)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her

  (1-320): View more from Minnesota

  that's how i am about ashleys and britneys

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  (320): her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her (1-320): that's how i am about ashleys and britneys http://tfl.nu/ea81
  Replies (61) Good night (1359) Bad night (1959)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.

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  (704): I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum. http://tfl.nu/041y
  Replies (11) Good night (682) Bad night (2843)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes

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  (412): i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes http://tfl.nu/hjgx
  Replies (55) Good night (819) Bad night (5829)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned

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  (607): Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned http://tfl.nu/r5xe
  Replies (6) Good night (1059) Bad night (4934)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.

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  (570): he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough. http://tfl.nu/fko8
  Replies (8) Good night (5085) Bad night (900)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?

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  (409): Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall? http://tfl.nu/ymbz
  Replies (7) Good night (2612) Bad night (973)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.

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  (250): Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks. http://tfl.nu/2d3d
  Replies (3) Good night (1897) Bad night (793)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on

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  (616): Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on http://tfl.nu/6qf1
  Replies (2) Good night (1124) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles

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  (303): Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles http://tfl.nu/cavu
  Replies (3) Good night (2257) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog

  (1-574): View more from Indiana

  knight in shining armor

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  (574): he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog (1-574): knight in shining armor http://tfl.nu/bdyw
  Replies (1) Good night (1107) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.

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  (860): you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something. http://tfl.nu/oy26
  Replies (5) Good night (921) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (432): View more from Texas

  Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.

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  (432): Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless. http://tfl.nu/ih1y
  Replies (0) Good night (727) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account

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  (515): you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account http://tfl.nu/u05o
  Replies (0) Good night (375) Bad night (557)

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