I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
These 25 Rude People Ruined Movies for Everyone Else
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.