I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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