Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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