Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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