i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
