Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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