He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
