No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
